I was working in the yard this weekend and got bitten by something. I first assumed it was a mosquito since I have some stagnant water behind my house and can't spend a considerable amount of time outside in the summer without walking around in a protective cloud of Cutter (smells like the woods! repels mosquitoes while attracting mountain men!). It really started itching today and I realized that it might be more than a mosquito.
After talking to my officemate and a friend I made the near-fatal mistake of asking Dr. Google about spider bites. I may never venture outside my hermetically sealed chamber again after seeing just a single picture of an untreated brown recluse bite. Luckily, my flesh has not yet started to rot but it can't be long now. If you don't hear from me after several days assume I am wasting away alone in my apartment surrounded by hungry cats or have joined up with Peter Parker to fight crime. It may be the latter, as I feel tingly all over and have been jumping out of my skin all afternoon. (Of course, it's always possible that those are just effects of my lunch-time bucket of diet coke.)
Google did say that there were two proven treatments for unknown insect bites: Coors Light and American Idol. It will be tough, but I think I can work that into my busy schedule tonight.
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